We had another great family Christmas and I was really happy that we could have family at home again this year, albeit slightly fewer than we had had last year, but I don’t know whether I could have coped with that number all at once again this year.
Cameron and Jamie were awake at a really reasonable hour considering what I remember of their father and his sisters at a similar age. But Caleb was ready for a good sleep and he had it, leaving the older boys champing at the bit waiting to open their presents. Finally Caleb woke and the ‘opening’ could begin and there was a lot of fun. But Jamie had developed a temperature and Keri and Jamie ended up spending most of the morning in the Emergency Room at Masterton Hospital till they had checked him out for meningitis. He finally came home (cleared of meningitis but suffering from a virus) and joined in with the others but Christmas day 2012, won’t be one that goes down in Jamie’s memory banks for the right reasons.
Christmas dinner followed at a suitably late hour and we didn’t need dinner, so after a busy morning the evening was relatively relaxed.
Following Christmas the rest of the family started to arrive for Maria’s wedding on 4 January. On 27th December the bride and groom, Maria and Greg, arrived and I drove down to Wellington on New Year’s Day to pick up both Frith and her three children, and my Mother of the Bride Dress. From then through to 4 January is pretty much a blur of getting ready for the wedding. a girls lunch out, more mundane things such as picking up all the wine, buying the beer and other beverages to be consumed on the day and finally on the day, having hair and makeup done and getting ourselves and everyone else ready for the occasion. There were a couple of minor hitches such as leaving the wedding jewellery, including the precious wedding rings, in Napier and one of our grandchildren vomiting in the the back of our car the day before the wedding. The same car was due to be the bridal car on the wedding day.
With the exception of the Father of the bride, the Bride and bridesmaids most of us arrived at the venue courtesy of a hired coach, which started at our place and made two more stops in Masterton picking up guests, and the bridegroom and his groomsmen. Despite the early weather predictions the day was absolutely perfect, in every way, and even a couple more glitches such as my forgetting to get some of the beverages that were tucked away in our fridge at home to the wedding venue, weren’t even noticed, except by me when I remembered what I had forgotten.
With the wedding over there was a family lunch the following day – a chance for all Greg’s English relatives to meet we Kiwis on a more informal basis, and the weather proved perfect for the occasion again, although the some of the English may have been feeling the heat (28 degrees C) a bit having come from winter in England.
The next day (6th) Simon and his family left and on the 7th, Maria, Greg, Frith and her children all left and after having 11 extras in the house for the week we were suddenly reduced to just the two of us, and the cats, again. The celebrations had finished, the holiday period was over and it was time to face up to reality again. For me the reality was that I had an appointment with the Oncologist on Wednesday, (9th).
I had been forewarned by the breast nurse at Boulcott that the Oncologist I was due to see was a very brilliant young man in the field and one at the forefront of medical research in New Zealand, but that he has a speech impediment. While we were in the waiting room the young man’s nurse came out after we had been waiting for about 25 minutes and told us the same thing, and to look to her for guidance if there was anything we didn’t understand.
I had thought I was about to meet someone with a marked stutter/stammer but the young doctor seemed to suffer from more than that, something more like cerebral palsy. Obviously his mind was not affected by his affliction but the whole consultation process was a bit more drawn out than it might have otherwise been as the palsy not only affected his speech and my understanding of it, but also the speed with which he could write notes and draw diagrams.
I must admit that I had been a bit sceptical about why I should have to put up with this 6 week divorce from my family, home and the things which make my life a happy place. If the cancer had been removed with clear tissue all around, and the lymph node showed no signs of cancer having travelled elsewhere in my body, why did I need this lengthy treatment. Its all in the name of reducing the likelihood of recurrence apparently. My chances of survival go up to 90% (from 70%) if I have the radiation therapy than if I don’t. He explained that the first 4.5 weeks the whole breast is irradiated and the last 1.5 weeks they concentrate on the area from where the tumours were excised. It still seems like overkill to put up with for 6 weeks but I’ll put up with it I suppose, in the interests of more family Christmases and other celebrations.
The side effects don’t sound like a bottle of laughs either. Lung tissue gets damaged, the whole breast will suffer from a degree of sunburn and there is the fatigue associated with the whole process. Fortunately, being my right breast there is no danger to my heart, and I am glad of that small mercy, at least.
So now I am waiting for a call from Wellington to go and get ‘measured up’ and to get the tattoos, which I had thought wouldn’t be necessary but the titanium I have inside my breast is only a marker for the last 1.5 weeks treatment! I then have to wait another two weeks after that for treatment to begin, so I am not likely to get into it until the last week of the month by the sound of things. More waiting and more anxiety. I discovered yesterday that while I can openly admit, without tears to the fact that have breast cancer, when it came to having to repeat my whole history for this period of my life again to the young doctor, I could not get through that first anxiety ridden 6 weeks through October/November without tears falling again.
So as a result of the long wait I have agreed to officiate at two Athletics Meetings on 25th and 26th January, one in Wellington and one in Masterton. Neither job should be too taxing and it will take my mind off the unpleasantness of the weeks to come for a while. Hopefully I will have my life back to be able to officiate at Nationals in Auckland at the end of March.